This morning Evelyn and I were in my room. She had been up for 20 minutes, and I was getting dressed. So she told me she was going downstairs, which is totally fine with me. Ten or fifteen minutes later I went downstairs, and I didn't see her anywhere, but the basement door was open, so I assumed she went down to the basement. "Evelyn? Are you down here?" I looked around the basement, and didn't see her. There is only one other place she could be. Evelyn never used to be brave enough to go outside by herself, but recently, that has all changed. She is allowed to be in the back yard by herself, but never without permission. I looked at the front door. Locked. The side door. Oh God. It's unlocked. Oh God. EVELYN?! EVELYN?! The back yard...empty. Garage...empty. My level of panic increasing exponentially with every passing second, I ran out front, still calling her name. She wasn't in the front yard. It is at this point that I know that this story could end very badly because I have no idea where else to look except for up and down the streets. Then I heard another voice besides mine. It wasn't Evelyn's. It was one of our neighbor's voices--a woman in her bathrobe who had apparently come out to get the paper and saw Evelyn. The woman was saying, "She's right here", but it seems like it took me forever to figure out what she was saying. My thoughts were racing. Then I saw Evelyn. She was just standing on the retaining wall in our neighbor's front yard. When I got to her, she was a little scared. I don't think she was scared of being there alone, but it scared her when she saw how I was acting and because the other neighbor lady was asking her questions. We talked about how she broke the rules and why it is not safe for her to be alone without my permission/supervision. To her, it was no big deal.

Later, I asked Evelyn if she had unlocked the door by herself. She said yes. I asked her to show me how she did it. She couldn't do it again. I think she just got lucky, but I know that soon, she will be able to do it by herself every time. I have such mixed emotions about Evelyn maturing, as does every parent. I am so proud that she is not afraid to go outside by herself. But I want to make sure that she never does it again. Sort of.

Don't laugh...

I really want to start a cosmetics review blog. You know, we have the CV cooking blog, why not the CV makeup blog? Its just that, when I score a great find in the world of beauty, I just want to spread the love around and let everyone know. Seriously, does that make me so bad?

The kids are driving me nuts today! Mainly just Gabe. He never wants to take an afternoon nap. I know I have just spoiled him by repeatedly going back into his room after putting him down and then rocking him to sleep. But it is a hard one to break since Evelyn is trying to sleep right next door. He was sick last week, so things got a little out of hand. Tonight we begin baby boot camp. Ugh.

Evelyn is now at the age where she is trying to delay bedtime as much as possible. She is getting pretty clever at it. One of my favorite tricks of hers is when she strains to try to get out a poop when we put her on the potty before bedtime. She does this a few times when I try to get her to wrap things up until I call her bluff. But in rare instances, she actually produces something, which just makes the whole thing funnier. To her, straining to get out a premature poop is better than having to go to bed.

Simon says

Evidently, Evelyn has Simon (of Simon says) and Jesus confused. We were just outside playing and she keeps saying, "Mommy, reach for the sky. And Jesus says touch the ground. And then touch your knees, and Jesus says jump!" Its a new twist on an old game. I know I should probably clarify the issue, but it is so funny. And besides, I don't really care if she knows anything about Simon at all. Right now, Jesus says touch the ground, and that is just fine with me.

Gabe's first steps

Gabe turned 11 months old yesterday, and he just took his first steps today. I am so glad Joe was here to see it! He was so cute and excited, and seemed to be into the idea wholeheartedly. Once he realized he could do it, he kept trying a bunch. I can't believe how fast the past 11 months have gone. It is slipping away so fast. Right now, he is still all sugar, sugar, sugar. No real rebellion to speak of. But someday soon he will wake up as a 3 year old who will tune me out when I talk and throw tantrums because he doesn't want to go to bed. I can't wait to see what he becomes, but right now I am going to try to hang on to baby Gabe.

Gabe, I need you to stay a baby just a little longer. And please, let me kiss you, even when you turn two.

Well, now everyone in the household has the stuffy nose. At least I think we all do. But now I don't have to worry about keeping everyone's germs away from everyone else's germs. And, Evelyn's symptoms don't seem to have lasted very long, so hopefully it will be short for us all. Gabe has the worst of it right now which stinks since he is still nursing. Ever tried to nurse a kid with a stuffy nose? Let me tell you, it is no walk in the park.

Finally, a nice weekend in the forcast! We have so much work to do in the yard, and I hope this stuffy nose business doesn't mess anything up.

Okay, I admit it

I love Dancing with the Stars. And I really love this season because I really love one of the stars. Apollo Anton Ohno. Did anyone see his samba? Damn. That mofo can dance! I love short track speed skating, and now it is so much fun to see him doing something so different from his normal career.

Some of the other contestants are good too. Laila Ali is good, although most of the rest of the women are pretty bad. And Billy Ray Cyrus is a sorta hilarious, but he is not such a good dancer. He just doesn't have it. I thought I would totally hate him, but he has turned out to be very interesting. He doesn't take himself too seriously, but yet he is not just blowing it off. He works hard.

My next step is to figure out a way that I can get myself on that show. I am not a professional ballroom dancer, and I don't play one on tv. Plus, I am not a star (although I am sure some of you would beg to differ). Let me know if anyone has any ideas.

Evelyn developed a super stuffy nose last night. It happened all of a sudden on the way home from home group. Today, she sounds so cute and sad when she talks. She can't breathe at all through her nose. I am doing hand washing, hand sanitizer and taking echinacea, but I just don't see how I will be able to avoid getting it. With all of the nose wiping that I am doing I know I am being exposed to it. Oh well.

In spite of how crummy I know she must feel, she still had the energy to scream "Don't touch me!" at me today. Blood curdling scream. I was trying to comfort her, but she would have none of it. It is so incredible to watch your little toddler morph into a monster at times.

Am I the only one with an 11 month old who won't nap right? Because I feel like I am right now. He won't take two naps, but he's not ready for one. And for some reason, it consumes me when my kids don't nap. It actually paralyzes me. Gabe is finally asleep, but I spent way too much time getting him to that point.

On a lighter note, Evelyn finally noticed that Gabe's anatomy is different from hers. She was watching me change his diaper one day. This is how it went:

Evelyn: Mommy, what does Gabe have?
Me: What do you mean? Do you mean his poopy?
Evelyn: No Mommy, what does Gabe have?
Me: What do you mean?
Evelyn: I mean his swingin' body.

So then we went on to clarify that his swingin' body is actually his penis. Frankly, I prefer swingin' body.

Happy Easter!

I had my family over to our house for Easter yesterday. It was actually very non stressful. My sisters (I have 4 of them) are great at pitching in, and they are all great cooks. But today, I find myself very sad as I mull over all the conversations we had.

One of my sisters in particular I keep judging in my heart today. As if I would do so much better if I were in her situation.

Then there was the part where I casually mentioned to another sister that I recently heard a study about hot dog consumption and type II diabetes. This was after her son indicated that they eat a lot of hot dogs. I am cringing now, just thinking about how cruel it was of me to say such a thing.

Lastly, I had a conversation with my mom about her hearing loss. My mom lost her hearing 5 years ago. She is not yet 60, so it is not normal age related hearing loss. She lost it all very quickly over a few months due to a rare auto-immune disorder. She has had a cochlear implant since then, but still can't hear very well. She especially can't hear in large group settings. There is just too much background noise. Anyway, she is really struggling with her limitations and how they make her feel so out of the loop. So many notions about what other people might be thinking. It breaks my heart. She probably has another 25 years with this and no really good solution.

I enjoy my family immensely. I am just not sure why I am sometimes such a self righteous ass around them.